Wow, it’s been weeks since I wrote anything. I guess I’ve been busier than I thought.
A bunch of updates:
Aimee has the loosest tooth in the world. You can see the other one coming in under it but she refuses to pull it out. I remember being so afraid to pull out a tooth that I swallowed it in my sleep, it was so loose. I’m sure it’ll pop out eventually… She won’t be a college student with a bunch of baby teeth flapping in the breeze, in front of her big teeth. Grade 2 this year, holy cow. And she’s so smart… reading just about anything, which is scary. She won’t always volunteer to sit and read, but she likes playing with books, and she is capable of figuring out words. She actually put a set of books in alphabetical order by title the other day. She’s a really nice kid now. I had my concerns for a while, but she really has settled into a smart, thoughtful, pretty little girl.
Jack is becoming such a little character. He’s been playing in a rock band at daycare this summer, requesting things like coloured hair gel. He still refuses to agree to piano lessons, but he does watch Canadian Idol religiously (along with the rest of us) and wants to be just like Rex (who wouldn’t?). One cool development, though, is that he learned to swim last week. All year he has refused to put his face in the water. Last year, he absolutely would not agree to swimming lessons, thinking that they would make him put his face in the water. Up to last Tuesday, he would not even blow bubbles. For a while, Trevor started to dunk him if he wouldn’t at least practice putting his face in, until it got to the point where Jack refused to go swimming. He would turn Pappa down when he came to pick them up early from daycare to go home for a swim, because he was worried Daddy would dunk him. Suddenly, one day, he started going under, on purpose, voluntarily. In the space of one day, he went from water-phobic to fish. Almost literally. He spends more time under than breathing. I think he’s developing gills. Now, he swims under water, jumps in (after a running start, no less), and would prefer swimming to watching tv. Amazing. And overnight. Complete 180. He’s inexplicable, that kid.
Jack starts kindergarten in 2 weeks. He’s making some reluctant noises every time we mention it, but boy oh boy does he need it. He’s bored stiff. I think he’ll do very well… he’ll be about the oldest in his class. He’s slowly starting to get control of his behaviour. There are, arguably, fewer major tantrums. Still lots of rotten behaviour, but I am now becoming convinced he will end up a civilized and likeable adult, eventually.
This means that in the very near future, I will be the mother of two school-aged kids. Man, how did that happed? There is no more baby fat in this house… they are long and lean and too smart for me. In fact, I will be the sugar mama soon… Trevor is also going back to school. Full time university. He is less excited about it than the kids are (which is to say, not excited at all). In fact, I’m more excited than all of them put together. I wish it was me. Maybe next year it will be my turn. I just need to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. In the meantime, I am the Major Breadwinner in our family. We’ll see how that goes.
Work lately is busy… some days not as rewarding as others. Both my docs are around now, no more summer vacation, so I am doing my original clinic assignment plus the admin-type stuff. I’m really tired tonight. I thought about Gramma a lot this week. Last week was unpleasantly stressful (the opposite of challenging… one of those weeks where there was so much going on, I was overwhelmed and my brain shut down, and I lost 50% of my capacity for work). It was miserable and frustrating and I didn’t want to be a nurse anymore. It was also the weekend they were burying Gramma’s ashes (Betty’s final parking spot, as the irreverents among us called it), which got me to thinking… how would she look at this stuff? I revisited my new year’s resolution, which had, as all resolutions do, fallen by the wayside somewhere, buried in the depths of my discontent, and realized that I could look at things as obstacles or as opportunities. My job has me figuring out and assigning a nurse to cover when another nurse is sick. No one likes to cover. No one likes to do 2 jobs, even for a day. Some whine long and loud about it. I had started dreading telling people when they needed to take their turn covering, because of the whining. When I thought of it as an opportunity, I realized that getting good at breaking bad news could be character building. Maybe it will help me develop a thicker skin. I also started thinking of coverage as an opportunity for a nurse to get some experience she may not ordinarily have the chance for. Somehow, even though this week was the worst yet for sick calls and the resulting staffing crisis (which I was responsible for fixing), I found that my minor attitude adjustment made the week feel less horrible. I’m exhausted now, but the week was bearable. I think Betty was guiding me through it. I’m not talking ghosts or anything supernatural, but if you think of it as a sense of spirituality, I think knowing how she would have looked at things gave me the chance to see them in a different light. I was able to use my energy more productively and more effectively. Thanks, Betty. Your legacy.
Hmmm… maybe I’d better drink to her. I think her spirit is guiding me to pour a stiff one.